


and i am a smiling woman

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, F/F, Fem Eren - Freeform, NSFW, genderbend eremika, lesbian eremika, mikasa is still female in this, post ch. 101, uniform sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-06 03:12:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13402209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: and they have longed for each other; mourned for each other.





	and i am a smiling woman

**Author's Note:**

> notes: title comes from sylvia’s plath lady lazarus. also, i dedicate this work to my hoes @iliankashingekinohogwarts @drunkeremikatexts @eien-no-tsuki even tho they’ve already read it and have fangirled over lesbian eremika with me. anyways, here it is. fem eren x mikasa. starts right after ch. 101. nsfw

everything pales in comparison to mikasa. she is vibrant; the warmest colour painted on this planet. her hands are rough against eren’s skin, calloused and abrasive and eren is sensitive to the touch.

“come home,” she says. “i love you, please come home.”

she can only imagine what mikasa went through in those eleven months. eren knows the pain she has felt; the longing of wanting mikasa between her thighs, kissing, biting and licking.

her hair is shorter than it was before, sharp bangs resting on her cheekbone. she looks taller, eren’s pretty sure that she’s taller than her, and it forms a heat in her stomach; an ache between her legs.

the cabin they’re in is small, with moonlight coming in rays through the opened window. eren can’t help herself; she pulls mikasa to her and pushing her mouth on hers, ferociously hungry, looking for that deep, dark ache that lays within mikasa.

“missed you so much,” eren say’s between kisses, between the meeting of tongues. “thought of you so many times. wanted you, so, so much.”

she’s pushed mikasa onto the ground and her hands roam across her body, grabbing whatever she can through the thick armour. mikasa’s own hands rest on eren’s ass, grabbing and squeezing and eren moans loudly. she is wet with need and she wants to shove her cunt into mikasa’s mouth, rock her body as mikasa’s tongue dives into her; even the thought of it is enough to make her frenzy.

eren unbuckles herself first, shaking fingers that quickly discard her pants and underwear right away. mikasa doesn’t need to be given any hints, but she goes slowly; leaving soft kisses in between eren’s parted thighs as growls with impatience. it’s all animalistic in here and eren tries to push herself into mikasa but mikasa holds her steady, one hand gripping her ass and the other her hip. eren can’t do anything but whimper in longing; like looking for shade in the desert.

“mikasa please.” eren tries to demand, but she knows that it comes off as pathetic instead. it’s a cruel thing that mikasa does whenever they make love. she goes slow; so slow that eren thinks she’ll come herself by how much the heat overtakes her. but this time it’s different; like a punishment, eren realizes. mikasa is punishing her, and eren can’t do anything but take it.

she begs. “mikasa please,” she says as her tongue ghosts across her sex, and eren moves to bring her hands down, but mikasa smacks them away and suddenly it’s eren who’s on the ground; pebbles scraping down her back. but she doesn’t care, because it’s mikasa with her tongue on her arousal, thrusting it inside and out.

the meeting itself is enough to make eren want to scream in relief; but she doesn’t. bites her lips and moans instead. it get’s hotter by the minute and eren shoves her hands in mikasa’s hair, pulling the strands closer to her. it was easier to do when mikasa’s hair was long, but it’s so short now and eren misses it so much. she remembers how the soft, silkly black strands would wrap around her hand as she’d pull mikasa’s head back, fucking her from behind. how mikasa’s half lidded eyes, filled with pleasure would look at eren like she was the only thing in the world that matters.

eleven months change a lot. and if there is anything eren has learned about mikasa’s body language, it’s that in this moment, she is very, very, angry.

eren is close; the heat that gathers in her stomach is beginning to steam and yes, mikasa, right there, fuck me right there, don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t -

and mikasa stops.

eren snaps her head up hard enough that it might break, looking at mikasa with wide eyes filled with rage.

“how dare you - “

and mikasa flips her on her front, grabbing her hips up allowing eren’s ass to wander obscenely in the air. mikasa rips away eren’s shirt, along with her bra, and this is different. this is so different.

it’s what she’s always wanted wasn’t it? to have mikasa take her so roughly that eren can’t see a thing? no matter how much she’s begged, mikasa never did it; preferring the passionate and slow lovemaking. no matter how eren begged, no matter how much she pleaded.

but it seems as thought mikasa will do it now. turn eren’s fantasy into a reality. mikasa will fuck her hard and heavy and eren will be destroyed in the process; a puddle of what she used to be.

she looks behind and the air is cold enough to contrast itself with the look in mikasa eyes. mikasa doesn’t give anything away with the look of hers, pulling her sleeve up as she licks two fingers, they’re eyes never leaving each other.

“oh god, mikasa,” the image itself is too much; this is too much. the fantasy is turning hollow and eren doesn’t want it anymore. she wants mikasa, with her lovely hair and shy eyes and her pussy rubbing on eren’s own. she wants mikasa to hold her untouched breasts; begging to be used.

slick fingers enter into eren so forcefully that she jumps out in pleasure. the fingers stay in, moving up and down, fingers twisting side to side as eren cries out.

the heat builds up again, and mikasa is close now, close enough that she grabs ahold of eren’s tit; squeezing and pinching until eren is sure that that is the only thing she can feel.

it turns lovingly soon enough, and mikasa plants a soft kiss between eren’s shoulder blades; so sweet and so long that eren can’t help but moan, can’t help but turn her head around to meet mikasa’s lips. mikasa brushes eren’s bangs to the side, leaving kisses all on the side of her neck, mouth coming to her ear, whispering something that makes eren shiver inside.

“you missed me eren?” she asks, and eren nods, her hips meeting each and every thrust of mikasa’s fingers.

“tell me how much.” she demands, fingers starting to go slow and eren groans in response. “tell me how much or i’ll stop.”

“so much,” eren says quickly. “more than you could ever imagine.”

“did you touch yourself?” mikasa’s asks. “did you touch yourself while thinking of me?”

“i did. so many times i did.”

there is a dark pleasure shown in mikasa’s eyes. pupils blown and a heavy panting and eren knows it’s not the image of her being fucked on her knees by mikasa that turns her on. it’s the idea of eren begging mikasa to fuck her until she can’t walk that turns her on. the idea of eren wanting mikasa, the idea of eren wanting her so much that she doesn’t know who she is without mikasa’s touch.

she’s right though; eren thinks that were she to go another month without mikasa’s skilled tongue and beautiful fingers, she might just die of frustration.

eren’s close now, and she thinks if she can just say the right things, mikasa will allow her blissful release; finally put an end to her misery.

“thought about you fucking me like this for so long. wanted you to take me; treat me like you paid for me,” the fingers inside of her quicken their pace in response. “god, you’re so beautiful. thought of you every time i shoved my hands down my pants, imagined you squeezing my breasts, taking them in your mouth, biting down on my nipples. thought of you fucking me into the ground so many times. thought about your fingers and your breasts and your pussy - oh god mikasa, oh fuck - “

a blinding white light enters eren’s eyes, and all she can think about in that moment is mikasa. consumed with the thought of her, of mikasa’s love, of mikasa’s beauty. this world is nothing compared to her. mikasa is ferocious; mikasa is gentle.

without her, eren is ravenous.

mikasa pulls her into her arms, rocking her naked body slowly, kissing her so gently, so lovingly that eren could cry. she’s missed this too much, and the pain she has tried to ignore these past months comes flooding down on her. she doesn’t cry, her pride does not allow it. but mikasa knows already; the emotions fill up the room, and she kisses eren on the mouth, a kiss of remembrance, a kiss of longing.

she sets eren down gently, and she looks at her, storing every detail, imprinting it onto her memory. she runs her fingers delicately through eren’s hair, nose buried in it as she inhales eren’s scent.

“you cut your hair.” eren says.

“it was getting in the way.”mikasa responds, kissing eren’s shoulder.

“that’s too bad. i grew out mine so that you and i would reach the same length.”

“i’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

eren saves that word. next time, of course there is a next time. it’s the gentle swaying of the wind, the moonlight covering their bodies; mikasa’s breath on eren’s face. they kiss, because there’s not enough of those that can fill the longing that lays between them. no words that can fill the emptiness, the quite rage that parted them.

with her, eren see’s colour. with her, eren lives.

 


End file.
